Don't You "You" Me

Every Wednesday morning, I attend a Mother's Fellowship group at my church. It's a fantastic group of ladies who meet for two hours each week to talk about parenting issues, share our joys and struggles, and drink lots of coffee. Meanwhile, our children enjoy supervised playtime in the newly renovated Child Care Center, which is, quite frankly, far more beautiful and functional than my children's home daycare environment.

I usually enjoy these mornings, so much so that I find my best mom days are Wednesdays, because I come back to my children at 11:30 with a renewed attitude and a refreshed spirit, ready to take on the busy lunch crowd at Panera with a smile.

Today, I came back to my children just plain pissed off. Why? Because our guest speaker spent more than an hour You-ing me.

"You need to be a consultant parent, coming alongside your children instead of leading them through every life challenge."

"You should speak patiently to your child while offering him a logical consequence."

"You get so stressed out that You just yell without thinking. It just comes out of Your mouth."

Now, I'm not going to judge this woman's opinions, and I don't totally disagree with her. In fact, I'm inclined to agree with many of the ideas she presented this morning.

But I cannot stand it when someone tells me how I should feel, or what goes through my mind before I yell. How on earth can you know how I feel? And do you know my children?

I love learning from other parents. I love to hear what bedtime tricks work for their kids. I love to know there are other women out there that struggled with post-partum depression. I love to share information that we've learned from the many child discipline books out there.

But I do not love being You-ed.

How about You?

Comments

[Sara]

I absolutely LOATHE being you-ed.I work hard not to make assumptions about others, and I find it patently offensive that a person might make such a massive set of assumptions about me, typically before we meet!
(sorry, got me on a soapbox)
Anyhoo, I am bummed that she wrecked your favorite day, especially if her message resonated with you. Makes you wish there was a way to tell her...doesn't it?

[Mike]

Good post...and I agree with YOU. ;)